Couples
Are you stuck in never-ending cycles of frustrating communication? Do you seem to have the same fights, over and over, that never end up getting resolved?
Most couples in distress are in the throes of these unanswered questions:
- Do I actually matter to you?
- When push comes to shove, will you have my back?
- Do you value me?
- Are you impacted by how I feel? By what I say?
- If I reach out to you, will you be there for me?
I am a Certified Emotionally Focused Couples (EFT) Therapist, and a Certified Gottman Couples Therapist. I strive to balance these evidence-based approaches with a shared humanity with my clients, and a deeply-held belief in the power of loving relationships to provide safe harbor in a fast-moving, unpredictable world.
My desire is to provide expert care, rather than treatment as usual.
Emotionally Focused Therapy is backed empirically — nearly three decades of scientific research showing that over 90% of couples improve their level of satisfaction in the relationship after completing therapy with an EFT-trained therapist. Between 70 to 75% of couples recover on standard measures of marital distress, demonstrating significant improvement in their relationship satisfaction. EFT also has demonstrated long-lasting effectiveness, with couples reporting continued emotional closeness and better conflict resolution even years after therapy has concluded.
EFT focuses on restructuring negative interaction patterns and fostering secure attachment, which makes relationships less vulnerable to external stressors.
This is not your ordinary couples therapy.
EFT provides a clear framework and map for repairing relationships. It stems from the premise that we are all hard-wired for attachment. When we lose connection and can no longer turn to our partner for nurturing and soothing, we often experience high levels of distress, leading us to either withdraw (shut down) or demand/escalate/fight/act out. These behaviors further fuel the distress causing couples to spiral into relationship trauma.
EFT offers a way out.
Together, we will resolve the pain and hurt; you will have emotional interactions with your partner that serve as corrective bonding experiences and you will break the repetitive patterns that block intimacy and safe, secure connection.
In EFT, we view relationship problems as stemming from unmet attachment needs, such as the need for security, comfort, and emotional connection. EFT helps partners identify and express vulnerable emotions, such as fear or sadness, that are often hidden beneath anger or withdrawal. We work together to change destructive interaction cycles, and replace them with supportive, emotionally responsive behaviors. We strengthen emotional bonds by fostering trust, empathy, and understanding. Partners learn to express emotional needs and fears in a way that invites understanding and connection. With these new (or rediscovered) abilities, couples can navigate life’s challenges collaboratively.